Be Clay And Stop Fighting The Wheel

Although I lost my initial recording, took a longer break than I wanted, I still felt the pull to come back with something real. On Mother’s Day, I’m back on the mic to reintroduce Be Clay and say out loud what a lot of us live quietly: we ask God for change, then we fight the very process that change requires.

Be Clay started with a prayer in 2020 and a hymn lyric that hit me like a mirror: “Thou art the potter, and I am the clay.” I saw a picture of myself resisting on the potter’s wheel, making a mess while God tried to shape me. That’s where “Be Clay” comes from, and that’s the challenge I’m carrying into this new stretch of the podcast: surrender to God isn’t a vibe, it’s a decision to stop grabbing the wheel back when pressure, tools, and the kiln show up.

We also talk about the words we repeat on autopilot, especially faith language like “I want to be like Christ.” Do we actually understand what we’re asking for? If being Christ-like includes not fitting in, being misunderstood, and paying a real cost, what does that mean for how we handle rejection, discomfort, and our need to be liked? I’m sharing the mindset shift that’s been helping me: define the words, study the life you’re trying to imitate, and be honest enough to pray, “Teach me how.”

If you’re rebuilding consistency, wrestling with control, or trying to grow up spiritually for real, press play. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs a reset, and leave a review so more people can find Be Clay.

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Not just a little, but greatly

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Transcript

Mother’s Day And A Comeback

SPEAKER_00 0:24

Welcome back. Welcome back. Okay. It's early in the morning, but welcome back. I'm back. Um, I did um first before I get into everything, let's just say happy Mother's Day to all the mothers, to everyone out there that is listening. Happy Mother's Day. Um, it is amazing of what we can do. We didn't know what we were made of until we had to just do. Um without God, we could not do. Um, and uh kudos, applaud every mother out there. I applaud you. I applaud you. So um, but I'm back now. I have went um not went, but there are some technical difficulties difficulties that has happened. Um, so right now I am still figuring this thing out, uh maybe utilizing some different uh platforms or software for the podcast because um I'm actually re-recording one because something just happened to what I recorded last month, and um I don't know, it just is gone. I don't know what happened, it's just gone. Um, so but I'm back and I know it's been a while. The last thing that I had put up there is um from December, and even the one that the last one that I did record for the year, I don't know, I'm gonna try and fix it and recover it, but if I do, um I'm going to upload that. If not, I don't know, we'll go from there. But um, with all that being said, welcome to uh another episode of B Clay Podcast. And um, we're going to figure this out because uh we are in May. Today's Mother's Day, so it's May 10th, and at the end of this month, uh May 31st, 2024 is when I recorded the first episode of B Clay, and June 1st is when I uploaded the first episode of B Clay. So it has been two years. Now, we know that I have not been continuously recording for two years. Um, I've been on this hiatus, but um, it's been two years since I started this, and and congratulations for two years, even though we are definitely going to make sure do better and make sure

Two Years Of B Clay

SPEAKER_00 3:05

that we are continuing this week. Um, this week I will make sure that I will um still use this platform as I'm looking to other platforms so we can have this thing continue and there'll be no more gaps in between episodes. So, with all that being said, in this episode, I'm actually reintroducing B Clay. Um just reintroducing B Clay and what is B Clay. I know that in the last episodes of well, the re you know, coming back episodes in 2025. Um, I did briefly, but I feel like this to be like, hey, let's reintroduce ourselves as B Clay, or where to really go into detail where it came from. Now, I did sing a little bit just earlier, but we're not doing we're not doing like I did that in the first episode because um it is really still early in the morning. So with all that being said, um B clay, where did that come from? Where did that come from? So in 2020, I one morning struggle as I was struggling with a lot of things and I was in prayer, actually in my bathroom, and just really, really crying out to God with all the things that I needed him to do. I just needed a breakthrough. Um, I was tired of str just tired

The Prayer Behind The Name

SPEAKER_00 4:50

of the struggle, tired of the uh torment and tired of you know just tired and so um so I'm the way to me that me and God communicate, we communicate through music. Okay and as we are as I'm praying, not as we as I'm talking to him and communicating eventually um as I uh uh go into a song, have thine a way, Lord. For those who may not know the song, have thine a way, have thine way, thou art the potter, and I am the clay. Mold me and make me after thine will, while I am waiting, yet yielded and still. And that is one of my favorite songs that I have been singing throughout the times, basically, because you know I grew up in the church, and so um as I'm singing this song this day, um as I get to I am the potter, I actually stop. I mean, thou art the pot, because that's that's my problem right there. That was the problem. I was trying to be the potter of my own self, right? Trying to be clay and the potter. That's really what was going on. So as I got to the when I got to the line, thou thou art the potter. Um, I immediately stopped because I saw myself on the potter's wheel in the room, and I'm on the potter's wheel, and the potter, the master's hand, is trying to mold me, attempting to mold me, and because I'm fighting him because I'm fighting him, I'm making a lot of mess. Okay, splattered all over the world of room, the ceilings, and everything. I'm just moving all around, moving all um, just moving and all around, just so much resistance as he tries to mold and in his hands, and I began I dropped and I cried. Even now, I'm just like, I can't, it's amazing because you know, and I began to repent and say, I'm so sorry. I I'm I'm so sorry that I wasn't being clay, like clay, that's not the what what is that it looks is ridiculous, right? And then eventually I start saying to myself, Alisa, you just have to be clay. Be clay. What does it really mean to be clay? To be clay is mean that I'm just being molded. You we you know, that's it. You don't have anything else to do. That is your position as clay, is just be molded. You don't have a say of what you want to be, you don't have a say on, you just don't. Your job as a clay is to be molded. Now, think about it. Now, the thou art the potter and I am the clay comes from multiple, you know, references in the Bible and scriptures, right? Um, where um where is referenced as the position of a potter now and the position and the role of clay. The position of the potter is to mold the clay into whatever it needs to be molded, whatever the master or the potter feels as though that they needs to be. Now, whether it needs to be a bowl, okay,

The Potter And The Clay

SPEAKER_00 8:55

so that a spoon, whatever they made it, um, you know, to to hold food and to eat with, whatever case and be, whatever purpose it needed to be uh utilized, that is what the master, the potter, had in mind to create. So who is the clay to say, you know what? I think, you know, you're about to make me into a cup, but I really want to be a cup. I think I'm better as a bull. You know, or I think I'm better as a vase. Like, I'd rather just have, you know, whatever. Like who that that's not the that's it doesn't look right, right? So um so with that being said, it not just the so be clay, right, is not just um the fact that as I'm not being the state of being clay, but it's also saying things and not really taking heed to what I say, right? Um not taking heed to what it really means of what I'm saying. Because so if I say thou art the potter and I am the clay, really means what I'm telling the potter is that I relinquish my control and I'm giving it to you, and I'm not gonna fight you because that's what it means to be clay, right? I'm no longer the master of my own life, right? I'm no longer the one that you know chooses, right? Or go after what I desire for me to be, but I'm going to allow you as the potter and be whatever you desire me to be, and that's what I'm saying. So then when things start to happen and I don't like it, now I want to take back what I said, but I told you that you are the potter. I told you that you are the potter, right? So now I don't like it. I don't like it. Now I don't because you about to put me into the kiln because you because you knew and understand that I need to be let all the purities have come out, so you put me into the kiln, and I don't want to go to the kiln. I I'd rather stay on the wheel, or you know, or maybe I don't want to be on the wheel because now as you in the wheel, now you're using tools to sky and to scrape and to mold, and and I don't like I don't like it. I don't like it. So now am I gonna change my mind? No, but I told you that you are the powder and I'm the clay. Is now time for me to really pay attention to what I'm saying. What does it mean what I'm saying? Like now, like really, like what do you what are you saying? That's just like saying, Because this is one of the things that we grew up, especially those who were in a church or whatever, and um we say it so many times because in reality we're supposed to. In reality, that's what we're supposed to do. We this is what we're supposed to, this is a type of mindset we're supposed to have, which is I want to be like you, right? Even if we're not about to go into what it really means to be a Christian, but um if we are, I'm not that's that's another episode, right? As far as, but let's just say, just to be a Christian, right? To be a Christian means to be Christ-like, right? And so therefore, when people look at us, they should see Christ all in us through us, right? So we say, I want to be like you. Just like have just like I'm the potter, I mean, stop saying that. Just like thou art the potter and I'm the clay, God, you are the potter and I'm the clay. That is in multiple songs. I mean, there is people who don't believe in God and have that in songs, but to be like Christ, that's in multiple songs. We say, I want to be like you, right? We say it all the time. You know, make me move me just to be like you. We want to think like you, talk like you. We we go in, we go in. But do we really understand what it really means to be like him? Like, have we really taken to like have we really sat down and think like what it really did? Did we actually take the time to even research, to read, to study, to know what it means to be like him? Who are you? So if I say I want to be like you, I need to know who you are, right? There's used to say, I want to be, I want to be like Mike, right? Right for the movie. But you for you to say that I want to be like somebody else, you actually have to take the time to actually study what it means to be like that person. But a lot of times we just say we might even and we might only take a clip of what we see and think, oh, that's good. I want to be like that person. But if you really take the time and actually study what it means to be like this person, you might actually change your mind, right? You really might change your mind. So let's just go back to Christ. Because we just say things just because and not really understanding what we say. Like we really do, I really do. Like, we just be opening up our mouths and just be like, this sounds good, sure. And we may actually really want to be like Christ, but we need to know what understand what

Saying Big Words Too Easily

SPEAKER_00 15:20

it means and say, Lord, I want to be like you, but like instead we say, I want to be like you, but I need help. Because in reality, uh, when you was walking down here, and then you saw all your authority, uh, they try to kill you every day. Every day they were trying to kill you, okay. Um, and uh, because that's really been my new motto, to be honest with you, because I really I was just sitting there, I was just thinking one day, like, you know what? Um, I say I want to be like you, but do I don't I realize they try to kill you every day? So why would somebody don't like me am I getting upset? Of course they don't like me because I look like you. I said I want to be like you, and I actually meant that. And I actually understood what it means to be like you, and I began to remove things that wasn't like you and allow you to fix me so that I can be like you, and then people started acting crazy around me, you know, just like me, don't like me for no reason whatsoever, trying to figure it out, but they don't know, but then of course they don't like me because I look like you and they did not like you. So why am I constantly trying to figure out why people don't like me and trying to change and then I because at one point I was you know trying to change myself, you know, trying to fit in. What? But if I'm like Jesus, I'm not, I don't fit in, he didn't fit in. So what do what do I look like fitting in? That don't really make any sense. What does it really mean to be like him? You can't want people to like you, you can't want the fame and fortune, but say, I want to be like him. He ain't come for that. He ain't about no fame and fortune and about people. Are you crazy? He ain't do that. What does it really mean? So, and in this day and the time, this is why I'm like really this is part of the reason why I decided to reintroduce because of what B Clay, because we're on this journey of really, really, really paying attention to what we really say, seriously, because like let me let me define these words that I've seen that I'm about to say, okay, because I don't really need to know and understand what it really means of what I'm saying, because we say it, like we say it, and then when it starts happening, now I got an attitude. Now something wrong, but it's not the wrong. This is what I say, this is what I said, this is what I wanted to happen. I said, You are the potter. I said that I claimed you to be the potter, right? I'm saying thou art the potter and I am the clay. That's what I said. That that means that I say that you are in control. So when you start doing things, why am I fighting against it? When I say that you are in control. I said that I'm clay and clay don't clay don't come back, they don't, they don't, they don't be like, yo, like I that's not what I want to be. Like what they don't even ask any questions, they don't say, are you are you are what you trying to make them? They just be molded. Whatever it has to do, whatever, whatever. I mean, they just mold it. I don't care

The Real Cost Of Christlikeness

SPEAKER_00 19:05

if clay started as one big old I whatever it started off, whether it was one big old my son came with this big old block of clay. Okay, this I mean a big, I mean a big block, a big block, a big block of clay that could be molded into multiple things. I think he still got it. He didn't make some things. We sat here, uh, me, him, and um his sister. Uh we in the room, you know, took some off of this big block, broke off into some pieces to make whatever. Now I only made I didn't even make that. I was trying to make a cup. Is actually I did I made the cup, it wasn't perfect, but it was made, it was created, right? Um, and he made something. My daughter was trying to make a gift for somebody, and um the she kept she needed more clay and used more, like it was they had to break the then the piece that she had received from my son. She actually even broken up the different pieces. So, whatever the clay, okay, this is whether the clay had to be broken up, whether the clay has to be ripped, like whatever the master, the potter, whatever it decides that it needs to do for and with this clay that they hold in their hands, the clay's position and role is to just allow it to happen. Allow it to happen. I don't care if it's you like, hey, they want to write your name or sketch something, they gotta use those tools and to write whatever it needs to do, whatever it needs to, all the putting water and how much water you need, whatever it needs to do, it's just it just moves. It's just be shaped in the master's hands, in the potter's hands. And so for me to say that you are the potter, and then try to take that position from him, right? Because I claimed you to be, and I'm gonna do it for you, mmm, right? We need to pay it, I need to pay attention to what I'm saying to say I want to be like you, but when people start treating me all types of whatever, and sometimes a lot of times I don't say anything, but neither did Jesus, just his presence, just his presence. He was just walking down the street, they up coming at him like yo, so you know, mmm, trying to set him up. He didn't even say nothing. You already trying to you, you I mean, they conjure up so many different things. I he ain't had to go to nobody, they came to him. So when things like so, when I find myself in these positions, I think it's something weird or something strange, like, oh my god, I'm upset. Am I? Why am I upset? I said I wanted to do. Like you so be clay, be clay, but be clay. If you really want to be clay, don't just say it. Really pay attention. What does that really mean? Okay? Like that's and everything else that you're saying is, you know, like that's that's not just because talk is very cheap. We talk about it with everybody else, how you know people just say things that don't really mean it. We could we can list many people, but do we ever put ourselves on that list? Let's pay attention to what we're actually saying. Let's let's let's pay attention to actually saying. So your children say some stuff to you like that, you be okay, mine, what are you doing? What who you talking to? Like, how you have the audacity to ask me those things or to come at me like that? Not even um, not even really understanding um the sacrifices, as children don't always understand the sacrifices that we make to do and just you know to give them what they want and need or whatever, and for them to have the audacity to ask me these questions, like what? Who do you talking to? Well, same thing with God, like you don't even understand what and tell because I am I am the potter, I am the master, I'm the one who does see all and knows all. So, how dare how you have the audacity to ask me these questions? Are you serious? You right, you right. So I need to literally not just say it, but do it, not just talk about it, be about it, right? As we say, all these because we we began to turn the word into cliches, and then we needed to stop, and we need to stop, you know. We need to stop. So with all that being said, today that is it. Um, I am like I said in the beginning, working on

Check Yourself Before You Speak

SPEAKER_00 24:55

uh because the platform that I was using, I had no issues until recently. Um the other issues why it took so long is not necessarily the platform in itself, it was really uh my device because I need a new one, and so we're working on all that. I will not uh have many many gaps um in this from the week to week. Uh you can also remember you can also go on YouTube to get all the old um episodes that I have, I think. So I will make sure you have the link to that. And until the next time, until next time, remember, okay, remember, we are we we need to check our own selves, check our own selves what we're saying, really pay attention to see if what you know what we what am I really what that really means. Like, don't just say things just because it sounds great. We've been growing up saying this all our lives. We heard my mama say it, we heard our grandmama say it, and it sounds great. Even if, even if, like I said, um, like be honest with yourself. You know what? I do want to be like you, but it's a little bit hard. I'm gonna need your help. Please don't say that, even and and and actually acknowledge in that you know what I'm really not like you, but I really want to be like you, so what teach me how to be like you? This really we should be saying too teach me how to be like you, you know, take and then take note. Am I being like you? Is this remember back in the day say what would Jesus do? But seriously, like Am I really like you? And so, because then we don't want to just say I want to be like you and take all the good, but don't take all the bad. There are multiple, we as people, there are people who are in high positions, and even celebrities who, as you know, whether it's children or ourselves, they're idolized celebrities, and if they actually started telling their story, because I was listening to uh one person um one time on a in an interview uh who was telling their story about their struggles of being, you know, in the light, and you'd be you know you'd be amazed, like really, I didn't think you actually, you know, wow, like you you went through that. You you'll think that they never they don't go through anything again, because we just assume we go by what we want to see and what what we want. We like the good, we like the glamour, we like the fame, we like the fortune, but we don't really understand the cost, what it costs to be, and that's why it's not just we don't need to

Tech Fixes And What’s Next

SPEAKER_00 27:55

just say these things, but we need to pay attention because what is gonna cost me? Like, what is it gonna cost me for you to be the powder and I'm the clay? What is it gonna cost me to be like you? What is it gonna cost me? Like, what does it what how much does it really cost? These words that I'm saying, how much does it cost? Mm-hmm. That's why I'm saying, like, we gotta uh we gotta do oh, I gotta do better. Even me, I'm I'm I like I we on this journey together, journey with me as we really take the time to understand what are we saying here, what's coming out of this mouth, because it caught there's a cost, there's a cost that we don't even realize that we're actually paying. So until next time, I will uh upload next week. Um, I am again, I am back. Thank you for listening. Thank you for being thank you for keep coming at me saying Alisa where you been. Um, what's up? Like, did you stop it? What's up? Thank you for holding me accountable. Okay, but I thank you, thank you, thank you. I am back, I am here, and until next time, love you. So I'm